Brutal Truths About Solo Travel (From Someone Who Loves It)

Travelling was something I had always wanted to do from a young age. I was born with an innate desire to see the world. It was not passed down to me, and I grew up around people who didn’t share the same passion. But at that young age, when I thought about travelling, I saw myself doing it with friends, with others. At that time, it never crossed my mind that there was even an option of doing it alone. All I saw around me were families, couples, and groups of friends going out and about and having a blast.

But having those friends who shared the same passion, life priorities and, well, budget, just rarely happened. So I started to simply go alone most times… and now I prefer it! Even though I am a millennial, I started to travel solo before it became a trend. Most importantly, before it started to be portrayed as some sort of spiritual journey, preached by Hollywood and social media.

If you are someone who’s been wondering if solo travelling is for you, or if you are just being influenced into doing it, or even if you’ve done it and absolutely hated it… let me give you my personal brutal truths about solo travelling. Hopefully, for those who have tried it and disliked it, this will make you feel better. And for those who are trying to decide whether to go on a solo adventure or not… this can help you make a decision.

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1. Solo Travelling Is Not for Everyone

Here, I said it. It’s not. I was born with the most adequate personality for solo travelling. I’m introverted, I love to spend time alone, and most of my favourite hobbies are one-person hobbies. I can kill time for hours just reading or writing. I love taking my camera on any adventure and having the time to shoot away by myself. I find meaning in self-reflection, in spending a few moments in silence in a sacred location, learning about its history, and often questioning my own beliefs.

Others are different. Extroverts, particularly, have a hard time if they can’t share the moment with someone else. A lot of people only find meaning in their experiences if these can be shared. People who struggle to simply be by themselves will not have a good experience solo travelling. Yes, you might meet some people. But also, you might not. A lot of solo travellers out there genuinely just want to be solo.

So if you’ve tried it and it didn’t work – it’s okay. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. And if you want to travel but have no one to go with, go for a solo group tour. And if you are someone who can’t even spend a day by yourself, who is extroverted, who hates doing things alone… then perhaps avoid travelling solo.

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2. Don’t Believe Instagram. Solo Travelling Is Hard!

Solo travel – especially if you are a planner like me – isn’t easy. You have only yourself to rely on in a foreign place. All the planning is on you. If something happens, it’s all on you. And yes, there will be moments of boredom, even some moments of melancholia. Sometimes, locals might not be nice. Sometimes, the accommodation might be shitty, and just because you join a tour or stay at a hostel, don’t expect to make friends. You might even be refused entrance to a restaurant for being solo (I only had this sort of experience once, but it does happen!), and eating alone is definitely a sticky point for many people (myself included at times!).

Not everything will go well – and you must be ready to face challenges head on. And, of course, let’s not forget safety. Being a solo traveller (especially as a woman) also means you will attract unwanted attention – and that safety is once again all on you.

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3. Solo Travelling Won’t Solve Your Problems…

Wherever you go, there you are. Anxiety, depression, grief, heartbreak… travelling can be a good distraction, but if you are alone and going through any of these things… if anything, more time alone might only amplify it. It will feel good perhaps for a day or two… but then, it’s only you, your thoughts (often toxic and your worst enemies), and a strange location. No one to bounce ideas off, no one you can just vent to. No one to distract you by talking about anything else besides yourself.

And if you are hoping to make like-minded friends or even find a romantic connection (thanks, Hollywood, for these expectations), think again. It doesn’t happen all the time, and most of the time it might not happen at all. Please don’t go solo travelling for this reason – you might find yourself incredibly disappointed.

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Why Does It Work for Me?

My passion for travelling came first. Then circumstances led me to solo travel. My personality agreed to it. And my expectations were solid – I simply wanted to see the world. I didn’t ask these experiences to be about self-discovery or healing. I didn’t do it because of a trend or to prove anything to anyone. Of course, I grew so much as a human being by exposing myself to it – but that’s something that will happen as a byproduct of any life experience. It doesn’t always have to be solo travelling. 🙂

So ask yourself a few questions, if you are considering it:

• Can I stay with myself for a few days in a row, without relying on the company of anyone?
• Why do I want to do it – is it a genuine interest in exploring a culture, a country, simply having a holiday somewhere, or are you hoping to run away from or toward something? Are you being influenced by social media accounts that only show you the good things and often lie to you?
• Are you looking to make friends, or find a like-minded community? This is not guaranteed, and you’re probably better off doing this at home.

These days, I don’t even ask my friends if they want to go somewhere. I simply book it.

The greatest thing that solo travelling did for me was to give me confidence – it made me realise that I am capable of so much more than I could ever have imagined at a young age. I grew up with low self-esteem, often judged for my shyness and introversion. I was also sickly as a child… and this led me to believe that I was not strong, and the idea of ever making it out there seemed more like an illusion than a reality.

Travelling has made me a better person, more open-minded, dismantling misconceptions and questioning my own beliefs about others, cultures, and countries. It often makes me connect the dots between different eras and different regions. But solo travelling? It made me deconstruct all the misconceptions I had about myself. I’m not a weakling. I’m capable. I’m resilient and resourceful.

So I’ll continue to travel solo – because deep down, I know I’m doing it for the right reasons.

Are you?

Love, Nic